Seriously, people? Stereotype much?

I live in small, rural town.  I get that.  But we are less than an HOUR from St. Louis.  You know, the BIG city...with BLACK PEOPLE!?!?  I swear I get some students that act as if they've never seen someone of color - black, slightly browner than them...ANYTHING.  There are no religions but Christian, there are no orientations but hetero....on and on and on. 
Today topped it all tho.  I'm teaching Oral Communications.  (Ok, get the oral jokes out now....I'll wait.)
Done?  Let's proceed.  We were talking about stereotypes and how they affect communication.  To illustrate, I posted 8 pictures of random people.  Couple of old people, one black guy, middle aged white lady, hoosier preggo chick, and one major butch dyke.  (Oh yes, I went there!)  The assignment was to imagine that you are in NYC and you HAVE to catch the next subway and you can't find your money.  You must ask one of these people for $5.  I had them rank them in order of who they'd ask first and on down the line and then why. 
All was fine and dandy until one group says..."I'd ask the colored man."  Wait, WTF did you just say???  I was speechless.  Who the fuck says that?  I corrected them which then prompted someone else to ask, "So we shouldn't use Negro, either?"  That was when my head exploded.  The worst part was that there was no embarrassment at all about this.  No shame at their straight up racism!  I am by far not a politically correct person.  Hell, Lisa Lampinelli is a personal favorite of mine....but fucking COLORED??!?!?  Is it 1965 and I missed the damned time travel?
I'm feeling a bit disgusted with my surroundings at the moment.  Wait til they figure out I'm a big ole dyke. 

Grief sucks

Please visit The Deviant Dyke and give her some love.  I can't imagine what she's going through or the depths of sadness in losing her love. 

It's timely to discuss grief as September looms...or as I think of it - the month of funerals.  Every September for the past 5 years someone has died.  It started with my 10 year old cousin.  Last year it was my best friend's 4 year old son.  September is going to suck with memories, especially of Daniel.

Hug your loved ones, EVERY DAMNED DAY.  Every second if they'll let you.  Don't hesitate to share your feelings.  Live your life so that there are never any "I wish I would haves" - especially in regards to your parents, spouse and children.  Tell them EVERY DAY that you love them and how special they are.  Live and love abundantly.

End of semester blues

Last night was the final exam in my summer class.  It is always difficult to end a class that's so much FUN.  This whole class just clicked.  I enjoy teaching so much  more when the students are willing to discuss and banter.  Not to mention, I personally knew over half the class.  Welcome to small town living!

Three more days till my baby is home.  This has been the longest month of my life.  My son should never be this far from me.  Well, I suppose when he goes to college, it will be ok.  But not at TEN!!!!  I will never understand how so many fathers can walk away from their children and not see them for weeks, months, even years on end.  I have been a complete wreck.  How can any parent stand knowing their child is on this earth and not want to be with them as much as possible?  I am not only talking about my ex, but my girl's ex, my sister's, numerous friend's exes.  These men just go on with their lives as if there are not babies out there that miss them?!!?!?  It's not just men, either.  I know of mothers that have walked on their kids and I simply cannot grasp that mindset.

My girl's grandma is still hanging on...even ate some broth.  She may outlive us all!

This has been a week of ups and downs.  Today, my mom and step dad have to allow their basset hound to make his journey to the rainbow bridge.  Having just done that with my boxer a few months ago I can understand their pain.  Bailey has been a great pooch.  He's lived at least two more years than anyone ever thought he would.  He's survived being hit by a truck (ASSHOLE REDNECK DRIVER), cancer/tumor dealy and numerous other ailments.  We will all miss the old man.

The Rainbow Bridge...For Bailey.

The battle has been won and life moves on.

Curly Sue has started asking for things.  HALLELUJAH!

On to other items.  

My redneck girl's grandma is in the last stages of her life and ready to move on.  Shes 93 and has lived a good life.  Of course, that doesn't make it any easier.  We are anticipating nastiness from three certain members of her family when we attend the inevitable funeral.   Close-minded, homophobic, irrational, slightly unhinged.....all good descriptors of certain people that we will be encountering.  To her credit, my girls is PISSED.   It took 7 months but she's finally flipped her internal switch from "I did this" to "Dude, ASSHOLE!?!?"  I am so glad to see it. 

In better news, the boy is coming home next week!! He's been with his dad 22 days.  My mom and I are heading down to get him on Friday.  SO READY. 

Redneck Lesbian Mom vs. Screaming Curly Headed Banshee

This is day two of my battle of the wills with the 18 month old.  Curly Sue refuses to talk.  She CAN say certain words, she'd just rather scream to get what she wants.  Soooooo.....guess who doesn't get what she wants unless she says the word?  There has been 24 hours of straight tantrums around here all because she won't say "milk" or "up" - both of which we KNOW the bratling can say. 

I will say, as amusing as this has been, I'm really ready for her to give in.  Rest assured, I will win this.  I'm done being screamed at by a curly-haired, blue eyed dictator. 

YOUR REIGN OF TERROR ENDS TODAY 

OH CURLY HEADED ONE!!!

What a day!

I've never been so happy and content in my life. 
Today was so normal and fun and incredible.  My lady and I, with my longtime BFF, took our pooches to the river.  I'm happily sunburned and exhausted.
I feel so blessed to have friends in my life that are completely accepting of my life, my love and my family.  L, my BFF, and I have been friends since I was 15.  That's, ahem, a while.  :D  Then I have my group of sisterchicks that make up my group of closest friends here in town.  They have all been there for me through this time of figuring out who I am and have loved me, my boy and now my new family.  How did I get so damned lucky?

Too much!

Why is it that stressors can't happen individually?  It must be one after another after another. 
Yesterday, our oldest left for a month with his dad.  In a DIFFERENT STATE.  My baby is going to be in a DIFFERENT state than me for an ENTIRE MONTH.  A MONTH, people.  That is a long, honkin time.  Let me qualify by saying that I am thrilled that he gets to spend that much time with his Daddy.  I just wish it were happening closer to home so I could still hug my man child regularly.
Then....my redneck girl got bad news.  Nothing life threatening, just stressful and sucky.  I won't go in to detail, suffice to say we will be fine.  She will be fine. 

In better news, we are kid free all weekend!!!  WOOOOOO HOOOOO!!!!!  I am quite looking forward to "us" time.  With two kids, jobs, the dog and all of our other obligations, us time can become a precious commodity.  I can't wait to just be alone with this woman I love.  No matter what challenges get thrown our way - we can make it because of this HUGE love we share.  It's amazing.  And I love her. :)

Pride!

This past weekend the family attended Pride in our nearest big city.  What an amazing day! 
Our eldest was slightly disturbed by the men running around in thongs, but other than that, it was extremely family friendly.  We assured him that WE didn't get it either.  lol
To be surrounded by families LIKE US was a feeling I can't describe.  Living out here in the boonies, it's easy to forget that we aren't the only lesbians in the world.  Sure, there are a bazillion and one blogs written by lesbians, but it's far different to actually sit next to and talk to other two mommy families.  I think it did the boy a world of good to see other families, also.
I worry, sometimes, what will he think when he's older?  He's only 10 and he thinks it's great that he has two moms.  I worry what his father will say to him.  I worry that other kids will pick on him.  I worry, worry, worry!!!!  This whole "mom is a lesbian thing" kind of sneaked up on him.  He obviously doesn't know about my forays to the dark side in college.  He doesn't know about the girl in high school.  He doesn't know, period.  He just knows that my redneck lesbian lives with us and we are getting married.  I wonder what questions he will have as he ages and will he ask me?  If he doesn't ask me, it terrifies me to think whom he WILL ask.
All in all, it was a fabulous weekend.  Off to the amusement park today with two kids.  I will sleep for a week after this!

Welcome!

Since my lovely redneck lesbian girlfriend keeps asking me if I've started the blog yet...I suppose I should start the blog, huh? 

I will start with who the heck we are.  We are two newly out lesbians that are head over heels in love.  Well, can you be "newly" out if it's been over six months?  We've been together a year now and are planning our commitment ceremony for summer of 2012.  We live in a very small town in the midwest.  We like guns, country music and big trucks.  We don't exactly fit the mold of traditional lesbians.  Hence, we are redneck lesbians (RESBIANS). 

We have blended our families - I have a ten year old son and she has a 17 month old daughter.   We also have our furry kids (as all good lesbians SHOULD! ha ha) One pooch and two cats.  Needless to say we live in a bit of a zoo. 

The point of this blog is to chronicle how we got here, how we are building our family and challenges we face.